4 DAYS AGO • 3 MIN READ

Stop Holding Your Breath: How Healing Starts with Letting Go

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Ready.Set. Grow! with Sybil Amuti

Welcome home! I'm Sybil Amuti, and I'm here to give you real talk, real friendships, and the confidence to live your best life—in a thriving community that's cheering you forward, choice by choice. Every week, I dive deep into the essential topics that shape our lives—personal development, entrepreneurship, spirituality, and the journey to overcoming self-sabotage as you become your best self. Join our incredible community of over 20,000 girlfriends who are committed to growth, empowerment, and success. Subscribe today for inspiration, mindset coaching, and actionable insights delivered straight to your inbox!

Hey, friend hey!

I HOPE YOU ARE WELL! This week has been great for me. Thank God! 🎉

Now let's get into the reason why I'm writing to you!

It’s been four years since my father’s passing, and I must say the grief process has changed—for the better.

I no longer cry at the thought of him.
I no longer daydream about my life as his daughter or cling to the memories we shared.
I no longer wish for more than the years we had together.

I am satisfied with what we had and what he left me with. Because I’ve stopped holding my breath and rethinking yesterday, I’ve given myself permission to accept, experience, and enjoy today.

It’s been a long journey, y’all. There’s something strange that happens when your parent transitions. It’s almost as if the earth quakes constantly, and your emotions feel shuffled. The world looks so different inside of grief, and so many people begin to withhold…

  • Withhold love and affection for fear of losing it…
  • Withhold money for fear of never having enough…
  • Withhold connection with people for fear of it one day ending…
  • Withhold the ability to dream big for fear that you’re wasting time…
  • Withhold efforts to stretch, grow, or shift for fear that you’ll bend or break beyond control…

What does the process of withholding point to? SCARCITY. And scarcity is rooted in fear—fear of not being enough or not having enough for today or tomorrow.

Are you picking up what I’m putting down?

Some of you may be thinking, “Sybil, why are you sharing this with us this week?”

I’m sharing this because so many times we’re holding our breath and don’t realize or understand why. Many of you have experienced some form of loss that pulled you into a pattern of withholding instead of healing. Some people think that healing can be put on hold. I disagree to the 12th degree!

Whether it’s the end of a marriage, a partnership, a job transition, a bad investment, a friendship failure, or the loss of a loved one, grief can be both heavy and haunting. Grief can distract you from the gift of the present and the people who are in place to love you. It can shackle you to fear, making you overlook your abundance.

If that’s you, let me encourage you to commit to healing your heart and clearing your mind. For me to heal through my father's passing, I had to accept that I would never be the same Sybil I was before. I had to stop expecting life to get back to “normal” because my normal had evolved. I needed to accept how I feel and how I approach the world today. I had to be honest, frequently, about my emotions and expect those feelings to be honored by the people in my life. I needed patience with myself, to embrace the time and attention healing requires. And I had to set new terms for myself and my relationships. Casual love and acceptance were no longer acceptable—I deserve active, evident love from those in my life.

And most importantly, I learned to stop holding my breath. When we hold our breath, we’re denying ourselves the fullness of life, the joy of living in the now. We’re too focused on managing loss or fear to inhale deeply, exhale fully, and experience the richness of each moment. Letting go of that instinct to hold your breath allows for a new kind of freedom—a freedom to heal without needing others to validate your progress, a freedom to breathe without fearing what’s next.

I’m not doing well because everyone says, “You seem great!” or “You’re looking better.” I’m doing well because I accept myself at all times, in all ways. That acceptance gave me the room to heal without waiting for external validation.

Back to you…

Here are three ways to give yourself the emotional space you need to heal through transitions:

  1. Acknowledge the Shift – Take time to honor the change you're experiencing. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a friendship, or a dream, embrace the truth that life has shifted and allow yourself to feel all the emotions that come with it.
  2. Be Present with Yourself – Stop waiting for things to "go back to normal." You are evolving, and it's okay to redefine what normal looks like for you now. Be patient, be kind, and most importantly, be honest with yourself about what you need in this moment.
  3. Release What No Longer Serves You – Let go of withholding love, joy, or connection because of fear or scarcity. Scarcity has no place in your healing. Allow abundance to flow into your relationships, your work, and your heart.

Grief may never fully go away, but healing makes room for the beauty of today and the possibilities of tomorrow.

Until next time, I encourage you to give yourself grace, allow space for growth, and embrace the love you deserve.

I'm cheering you forward from victory to victory,


Sybil.

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Ready.Set. Grow! with Sybil Amuti

Welcome home! I'm Sybil Amuti, and I'm here to give you real talk, real friendships, and the confidence to live your best life—in a thriving community that's cheering you forward, choice by choice. Every week, I dive deep into the essential topics that shape our lives—personal development, entrepreneurship, spirituality, and the journey to overcoming self-sabotage as you become your best self. Join our incredible community of over 20,000 girlfriends who are committed to growth, empowerment, and success. Subscribe today for inspiration, mindset coaching, and actionable insights delivered straight to your inbox!